Sunday Spotlight: MacKenzie's Story- "Patience with Pregnancy"

We are starting another new series to our blog "Sunday Spotlights" where we interview standout moms with exceptional stories and experiences.  These moms share their secrets of how they coped or continue to cope with life's speed bumps.  We love these women and are excited to share with you this week MacKenzie McFarlane.

 Lately, I have had a few friends come to me with their frustrations in trying to get pregnant.  There are so many emotions that come with growing your family and Kenzie's story is worth hearing about.  Yes, I am a little bias because she is my sister-in-law but her story of Patience with Pregnancy will encourage all those mommies out there struggling to get pregnant.  Here is our interview. Enjoy.



Q. When did you know you were finally ready to start your family? What was the hardest part about not getting pregnant?

A. I remember driving home from family dinner one Sunday evening when our conversation turned to the topic of kids. We (Ryan and I) both looked at each other and agreed that we felt it was time to start a family. We had put off having kids for several years but for some reason, it finally felt like  "the right" time.

I think the hardest part about not getting pregnant was the fact that it felt like it was time to start a family but wasn't actually happening for us. Seeing everyone else around us getting pregnant and not having any control over the situation was definitely a struggle.

Q. What are some ways that helped you and Ryan cope through your families struggle of trying to get pregnant? Was there anyone (or thing) that helped give advice/support to you that seemed to help? And what was it?

A. Although we tried to be stay positive, I had occasional low points where I really struggled. Ryan was always supportive and willing to listen to me vent my frustrations. 
He would offer his insight and remind me that we were in it together. One of the biggest lessons that we learned during that time was that God has a plan for each of us. We can try to plan our lives as much as we want but in the end, His plan trumps all. Our struggle with infertility taught us to have faith in that plan.

Q. What was your turning point to finally going to the doctor for help? What procedures did you and Ryan try (advised by the doctor)?What finally worked for you to get pregnant?

A. Our insurance wouldn't cover fertility treatments until we had been trying to get pregnant for at least a year. Once we hit that year mark, we were referred to the Fertility Treatment Center in Chandler. We loved our doctor and left our first appointment feeling optimistic about the fertility "plan" our doctor had created. After running several tests on both Ryan and I, we started our first round of IUI (Intrauterine Insemination). We got pregnant that first round but the pregnancy resulted in an early miscarriage referred to as a "chemical pregnancy." We waited a month and then started our second round of IUI which resulted in the pregnancy of our little girl.

Q. Now that you have 2 beautiful children, is there anything you would have done differently during the whole experience? 

A. As frustrating as the whole thing was, there really isn't a thing I would change about our experience. It was hard at the time, we struggled, and eventually it brought us to where we are today. When we finally had our kids, the timing couldn't have been any better. Our struggles helped us grow and ultimately strengthened our marriage and have made us better parents.

Q. What advice would you give families in this same situation?

A. For those struggling with infertility, I have 3 pieces of advice...

1. If you've been struggling with infertility for a while, I would definitely advise making an appointment with a fertility specialist as opposed to an OBGYN. OB's can only help so much and tend to make those struggling with infertility feel more helpless than anything else. 

2. As difficult as it is, learn to be happy for others around you. There is nothing harder than not being able to get pregnant and having to watch others around you have kids. Just because it's not happening for you, doesn't mean it shouldn't happen for other people. Don't let this eat you up inside, force yourself to learn to be happy for others. Even if you're not happy, learn to "fake it 'til you make it." In time, this "faking it" will turn in to genuine happiness for others. Trust me, people will respect you so much more if you can learn to smile through your tears.

3. I think that women struggling with infertility tend to freak themselves out (me included) to the point where it throws their body off and makes it even more difficult to get pregnant. As hard as it is, try to relax and take it all in stride. When the time is right, it WILL happen. Have faith in God's plan for you.

Thanks so MUCH, MacKenzie, for sharing your story with us.  The McFarlane family now has two little ones, Maeli and Milo, and they are the cutest kids ever!  We appreciate your time and your advice, Kenz.

If you have a similar experience post your advice or comments below. -Cami 

Fashionsista Challenge #2

We're at it again! Kelbs' new challenge for the week is a collaboration: long sheer shirt, leggins, cropped jacket and cowboy boots. Sheer shirts are really in right now and she obviously suggested wearing a tank underneath.  Above she posted a sheer shirt with no sleeves.  Kelby recommends a jacket or a longer sleeve sheer shirt for those who want more cover up.  Here's how my outfit turned out.

 Where did I get my get up? I already had this fake leather jacket, sheer cheetah shirt from Kohl for $28,  Forever21 leggings (from last season), boots from Wet Seal $32, and your usual Down East Outfitters undershirt for around $8. I wore this get up to the pumpkin patch with my two favorite boys. I felt like one hip mama. Thanks, Kelbs! Challenge#2 COMPLETE! -Cami

Round 2

Last weekend was a doozy.  I mean seriously, I was questioning my sanity and Laura's.  Thankfully, I am already beginning to forget some of the details but, suffice it to say Laura is growing up....

Saturday, she was a MESS.  Picture an emotional, hormonal, 9 month pregnant lady and it may help describe Laura's mindset.  Yes, I know she is 3 so she obviously isn't hormonal and most certainly not pregnant but, wow.  Saturday all day she wouldn't listen.  I would tell her what she needed to do, wouldn't do it, get reminded, start crying, still wouldn't do the desired task, I would ask, remind, plead, threaten a consequence.  It was a mess.

Sunday morning wasn't any better.  I woke up to her coming into my bed.  She was reminded to please take her pull up off if she is coming into my bed to sleep (she knows this expectation). She starts crying/whimpering explaining that she will only be in my bed for a few minutes and then go back to her bad.  I agree.  She then falls asleep in my bed.  We wake up to the dog.  I ask her to please take her pull up off if she is sleeping in my bed.  She starts crying that she doesn't want too.  I remind her that if she is sleeping in my bed the pull up needs to come off.  She refuses, I ask her to go to her bed if she won't take her pull up off.  She doesn't want to go to her bed.  I AGAIN ask that she takes the pull up off.  She is now super upset.  I offer to help her, she refuses.  She tells me to go to bed (so I do).  THEN she asks me to get out of bed and help her take her pull up off.  I help her take her pull up off.  She then dissolves into tears.  She didn't want her pull up off.  I explain to her that I did as she asked.  After a few minutes she crawls back into my bed and falls asleep.  This was all before 6am!

So, I kept questioning EVERYTHING.  This isn't my normal Laura.  I mean yes she does have her moments.  But, ALL day even the next day?!  I contemplated and thought and thought.  I realized that she was obviously going through a growth spurt with her emotions.  Did you know that kids development emotions and that they are growing into them?  So, sometimes they have so much new feelings/emotions that they do not know what to do with them.  And second, I was NOT being consistent.  She was being so ridiculous that I was giving her a million chances because I wasn't even sure that she was comprehending what I was saying.  Therefore, I was just feeding into her.  This seriously was an evolving process.  Which continued even as I was driving to Globe for work this week (yes I do that WEEKLY).  So, I took deep breaths through this process and yes, I had super grumpy moments and powered through....and fell on my face a few times.  But, hey we are both learning, right? :-)

To be continued...Loni

FashionSista Challenge 1: Twist Headband

I accepted the first challenge of the Twist Headband AKA bunny ears or scarf headband.  So since the closest American Apparel was in Tempe for me, I decided to see if I could whip one up myself and save some money. I attempted the headband 2 times; the first free hand stitch and the second with a sewing machine.  I noticed I had all the material to make the first one, so it cost me $0 and the second I paid $1.30 by getting 1/4 of a yard of fabric at Hobby Lobby (with the 40% coupon from their website). Here's my tutorial. Hope you like!

What you need:
Fabric
Floral wire
Scissors
Sewing Machine/needle and thread 
Measuring tape/ruler
Sewing Pins

1. Find your fabric.

 2. Cut your desired length and width. I cut mine a little more than 3 feet in lenght & 3 inches in width. Loni did hers a little bigger.

 3. Fold the fabric inside out and in half. Cut diagonal corners and pin it in place.

4. Sew it in place. You can hand stitch it, I did for the first one, Loni machine sewed the second. Make sure you keep one end open to place the wire inside. Once finished pull your fabric through so it is no longer inside out.

5. Measure your floral wire just shy of the length of your fabric. Loop the ends so it won't poke through. I doubled up my wire to make it was a tad sturdier and sewed the remainder closed. And you're done!

Here's some ways to to wear it: double loose knot, bun bunny ears, and flower (loosed double knot). I likey! Thanks, Kelbs!!- Cami

My sister, Brittney, rocking American Apparel striped headband.

FashionSista- The Challenge Begins!

"Beauty starts from within" is a statement I truly believe in, but what happens when you don't take care of the outside? Does dressing a certain way really change the way you respect and hold yourself? I believe so.  When I get up in the morning and don't get ready for the day, I feel bluh. I mean I HAVE those days for sure. Also, wearing the same clothes over and over again...boorrrinnnggg! I think it's appropriate to care for yourself on the outside so it shows a glimpse of your inside.  Make this note to another great coping skill of personal care and upkeep!

This got me thinking, why not get try once a week make an effort to stay up to date with the latest trends and styles and who else not to help me with doing this than my baby sista!

She inspired me to start a new series with the blog called "FashionSista" where my teenaged, drop dead gorgeous sister challenges me to a weekly fashion mini make over.  I have a week to except the fashion challenge to find or put together from the master designer. Watch out date nights... cause it's going to be hot!
 

 Here is the sneak peak of the first FashionSista CHALLENGE:

Sanity

Holy cow it has been awhile since our last post!  What can we say? Life happens! 

I think maybe this should be our motto!?

This week has been a little crazy.  Not super crazy but, crazy enough. 

Saturday I thought I had it under control.  I knew I needed to clean (I did!!) Sunday, went well and I took Laura to my Mom's because I had to leave for Tucson at 6:30 the next morning (I ended up having a late night but, I made it work).  Went to Tucson (Monday morning), drove home and got my girl and got home by 8ish(pm). Tuesday, Boyfriend calls and needs a favor.  He is out of town and I have a (very causual) dinner party that I am hosting that night.  This COMPLETELY threw me off.  But, it worked out.  But, now I am getting TiReD.  Wednesday, I get up early and drive to Globe, get my girl from the babysitter's and RUSH to Boyfriend's house because he is driving down from Show Low so, I need to let his company in his house (he forgets that I am in GLOBE).  So, Wednesday night we kinda see eachother (remember he has company).  I still had to edit my friend's paper (she is in an MSW program) oh and my kitchen is STILL dirty from the dinner party the night before.  And Laura is a mess, she is exhausted.  (Ends up being a late night again). 

So, what happened today?  Well, I called Cami.  I needed a pep talk.  I am super tired, frustrated at things in my life and poor Laura has the runs.  So, after my pep talk with Cami I got to thinking.  Because truthfully, my life is pretty darn great.  Can it be stressful? Absolutely! Is it what I planned?  NO!!!!!!!

But, I am happy and honestly I am proud of myself.  I am proud at the limits that I have set for myself.  These limits cause me to just have a bad morning and to most likely recognize it (versus not having limits I would totally go crazy).  I don't go crazy because I dont't overwhelm myself.  and I am OK that it took me 2 days to clean my kitchen (did I mention my dishwasher is broken? ugh!).  I at times have also felt  judged for not putting enough on my plate or for not doing something fun with Laura because I knew it would not be a good idea.  But, I am learning that I probably am not being judged and it is probably just me and my own insecurities and what is most important is my SANITY.  Because if Momma is Sane, Everyone Else is TOO!   

Relaxing is good for the soul.  If you don't know how to do it. Learn it!